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Tendencies

by First Person

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1.
Family Tree 03:26
So will the kid take after me? And will he be something to see? Well, nothing’s ever quite what it seems Oh father, what a price we pay When our fears get in the way Oh mother, what if I’m deranged Would you still love me anyway? I’ve been drawn to edges and clouds But god it’s such a long way down Oh brother, what a mess we make When our pride gets in the way Oh sister, what if I’m profane Would you still love me anyway, anyway?
2.
You know that I Would like to try To live a life More dignified And walk around This goofy little town My head up high Not feeling sad inside Yet baby… It always hits It always hits It always hits It always hits I must confide In short supply Is a sense of pride I’m not certain why I don’t want to get you down It’s not as bad as I make it sound Most the time I’m doing fine Yesterday I had a great time Though baby… It always hits It always hits It always hits It always hits
3.
Another day goes by And it’s the same old shit Endless animus So can we call it quits? Are you gonna Are you gonna cry? And keep us up all Keep us up all night? Is it possible We got nothing right? Is it possible This was a waste of time? Do you wanna Do you wanna fight? Over something Something oh so trite? Well, is it possible We got nothing right? Is it possible It was a waste of time? Is it possible? Is it possible? Is it possible? Is it possible? Is it possible We got nothing right? Is it possible This was a waste of time? Is it possible? Is it possible? Is it possible? Is it possible?
4.
Stop Myself 04:02
Explain yourself, now at once They need to hear The tendencies of your life Have brought us here If truth be told I tried too hard I loved too much When I come down Will you be around? It’d mean so much What would I do without your kind? I wouldn’t survive You know my head is filled with knots All tangled tight If truth be told I tried too hard I loved too much When I come down Will you be around? It’d mean so much If truth be told I tried too hard I wanted too much When I get out Will you be around? It’d mean so much Guess what? I can’t help myself Guess why? ‘Cause I can’t stop myself And guess who Suffers from this hell? Yes you ‘Cause I can’t stop myself I can’t stop myself I can’t stop myself
5.
She took my energy, yeah Won’t give it back to me, yeah Sedona whispers things, yeah ‘Come back and visit me,’ yeah I was born to find Out about your reasons why I’ve been looking low and high Though your logic twists my mind Been soaked in LSD, yeah See signs in everything, yeah Mediate on freeways, yeah Read much philosophy, yeah I was born to find Out about your reasons why Look into my eyes Is there anyone inside?
6.
I’ll face the facts when facts get straight I’ll take the blame for my mistakes Your version of our history Flirts with intent of forgery I am sorry That you’re angry But it’s telling That you’re not happy anywhere, so Are you tired Of pretending That it’s working? I can’t take you anywhere I swear to god, not anywhere No, I can’t take you anywhere Oh god, I swear, not anywhere We use to care about some things Lines not to cross by any means Like choosing words so not to hurt Like trying not to make things worse I am sorry That you hate me But it’s telling That you’re not happy anywhere, so Are you tired Of pretending That it’s working? I can’t take you anywhere I swear to god, not anywhere No, I can’t take you anywhere Oh god, I swear, not anywhere
7.
So sing along, that’s fine Supporting roles, should suffice They say you had your chance Now move along and don’t be sad Who was I To want something more To think that you Were worth waiting for It’s all a dream That lives in my head Casting shadows Like, ‘what might have been’ I’ll never dream again I’ll never dream again Oh I have learned my lesson Oh I have learned my lesson It’s like a fever, you know A sickness, of sorts, that grows It’s not going away That’s right, you’re here to stay Who was I To want something more To think that you Were worth fighting for It’s all a dream That’s stuck in my head Casting shadows Like, ‘what might have been’ I’ll never dream again I’ll never dream again Oh I have learned my lesson Oh I have learned my lesson
8.
I’m a robot that Performs functions that Runs on programs that Were designed for that I’m predictable So responsible So not like before When I lived for more I want to go back to Sweet sixteen Learning to drive And kissing everything Falling in love As angsty as can be It seems like a dream He’s a stranger to me You are so Hard to find You are so Hard to find I want to go back to Sweet sixteen Learning to drive And smoking everything Falling in love As angsty as can be It seems like a dream He’s a stranger to me I want to go back to Age sixteen Learning to drive And kissing everything Falling in love Yeah, as angsty as can be It seems like a dream She’s a stranger to me You are so Hard to find You are so Hard to find
9.
Meant To Be 02:57
Rise and shine It is time to wake up sleepy head Since today We’ve got a new mission This last night I saw visions of a better life Cause of you Whoever you might be I know it’s meant to be I saw us in a dream We were in a park Like Seurat’s painting No more doubt Time to follow my intuition To deny Is all too rational Says a friend There’s no such thing as a coincidence So I’ll wait Wait there patiently I know it’s meant to be I saw us in a dream We were in a park Like Seurat’s painting Fast forward to present It’s week seventeen The city park circuit Is now my routine For she who is wondering I’ll be reading alone A copy of ‘mix tape’ Do please say hello I know it’s meant to be I saw us in a dream We were in a park Like Seurat’s painting
10.
You need to be Out in the open You should just swim Into the ocean You’ll find it there Find your conversion

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released January 7, 2019

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First Person Los Angeles, California

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